Sunday, September 5, 2010


Heartless hollow hearts
Lashing out just to cover

Saturday, September 4, 2010

Hello, I'm.... Single.

So I already know the cliche "let go and let God"... but I'm pretty sure even He knows me well enough to know what's on my mind: I'm over being single.

Yeah, I can't lie.  I was a part of that whole "Irreplaceable/ If I Were a Boy/ Single Ladies" Beyonce train but.. I think I'm over it. I'm more ready for my own saved, twenty-something Jay-Z.  But I guess when I think about my life, I have a couple of warning signs that are probably blaring loudly at all of my recent "dating" pals since I've hopped back in the selection pool:

1. I'm most likely not settling in D.C. post-grad.
So, I guess this is a huge issue for dudes trying to get serious with me.  I am like a nomad, with no real direction except for the fact that my stay in the Nation's Capital is more than possibly coming close to an end over the next year.  I'm graduating from (the real) HU in December, and all the grad programs I'm applying for are out of the DMV area.  You can say I'm doing me, but I have subsequently cut off the possibility of a real relationship because most guys, while already unwilling to commit, probably wouldn't commit to someone who is planning to bounce anyway.

2. I'm picky.
I have the weirdest likes and dislikes and by all means, I am flexible on many levels at what I'd accept, but the fact is, if a guy doesn't meet one of my strong desires, I can't even fake-like him.  I know a lot of girls have that uncanny ability to lead guys on and front... I mean Pharell dedicated a whole track to those types, but I just don't possess that skill.  Once I'm turned off, I go cold and it's hard to go back.  So that shuts me off from "giving him a shot" and yeah, it probably shuts down my window of opportunity.  But I'm a stickler for what I like, and I know God will send me the desire of my heart.  I'm convinced the one for me will stick out like a sore thumb. (Wishful thinking?)

3. Well.... I guess that's it.

So what does that mean for single me?  Am I destined to spend this next year in social purgatory?
We'll just have to wait.  But until then, this same dialogue will continue to play out:

Him: Hey, I'm Chris.
Me: Hey, I'm.... Single.